Bookless in Seattle

If it weren't so pathetic, it would be amusing. The people who pre-ordered my book from Amazon have received it before I received my author copies! I need lots of copies for the PR firm and I should have had them weeks ago. I tried several methods: asking, purchasing from the warehouse, begging. Friday morning I even considered buying them from the miscreants who stole them and put 'em on eBay. My agent's amazing assistant Adam, and my hard-working publicist Kim seem to have straightened the situation out -- but i won't believe it till I see it!! Of course every other day people I work with or know vaguely say things like "aren't you going to give me an autographed copy"? and i just have to burst out laughing. As if I could!! No way, honey, you'll have to buy it just like I do!!

I Need Martin Short

from Father of the Bride. I need a wedding planner with a crazy accent to organize all the details of the parties, promotions, advertising and PR i've set in motion surrounding this book. I can't even throw a dinner party, let alone a launch party. SIGH. This, my friends, is why wealthy people write books. Because only they have the money to launch them with the help of Martin Short.

The 250-Page Baby Has Arrived

Yee-ha, the book arrived in the mail today! Yes, the real book, the actual book, not the galley, not the first pages, the real four-color bound thang. I immediately put it in a zip-lock bag and told everyone who wanted to see it to put on gloves!! (Maybe I'll just make everyone wash their hands and sign a confidentiality agreement . . .)